This is in relation to the article that Sharin posted in the news thread today. "He is not at ease being tagged as sexy. 'Never in my life have I ever thought of myself attached to the word, which I’m [also] unable to say,' he pointed out. 'Yes, indeed. That, to me, is a ridiculous notion. I mean, it’s very strange.'”
As often as he says this, I'm still curious about it. He's obviously aware that everyone else thinks he's sexy. He's told ad nauseum. He's aware of having been in relationships with very attractive women, which would imply that he's probably on a level with them. On the other hand, I can relate to the idea that if you didn't think of yourself that way when you were young, then it's hard to overcome that later. And I can understand his thing about vanity, not *wanting* to let it sink in. And I can understand that if he's not particularly attracted to men, that it may be hard to see what makes a man sexy and that he's got it. But still, as often as he's heard it, and the way people respond to him, and the way he acts and dresses and poses in photos like he knows it sometimes... What's really going on in his psyche about that?
Post by LittleBird on Jun 22, 2013 14:18:10 GMT -5
Excellent question Monet. It is interesting isn't it? I wonder if it's like it is for a lot of women. You have days that you just don't feel attractive. You think of things that may have been said to you. and damaged your self esteem, you think about how cruel kids were in school. Then you have a good day. and you might buy an outfit and feel really good about yourself. Get your hair done. etc. Johnny gets dressed up looks nice and it makes him feel better about himself, then we have photos and poses of him looking like he knows he's the man.
I'm not saying this happens for all women but for me - I run through both feelings a lot. Sure mine spawns form my childhood - it wasn't a good time at all for me, and then you have people tell you later in life "You're a pretty girl" and it really means nothing because how we perceive ourselves is so strong and so important to our selves. What we believe is potent, and powerful. No matter how many times. and how many people say something it's like you know different.
Yeah, I think that's part of what makes it interesting to me. My own struggles about that--self-image and everything. And I wonder what it would be like to be someone that people just want that way. If I got the attention he gets, I think I would let it sink in, it would make me feel attractive, it would be good for me. But his issues are different, I suppose. He thinks of it as avoiding vanity, not overcoming low self-esteem.
Also, it's got to be different for men than it is for women. Women are used to being judged on the basis of sex appeal. Men are usually judged more based on professional success. So maybe it's weird for him in that sense too. Or maybe it's the same--he'd rather think of himself as good at what he does than as a pretty boy. Maybe it's related to the whole product thing. But still, I can't imagine him letting the system alienate him from himself--I mean, from his own sex appeal--over the long term. He'd take it back. He'd take ownership of it.
Post by LittleBird on Jun 22, 2013 14:54:21 GMT -5
Beats me. I'd never and have never ever felt sexy except maybe in my dreams and even those are few and far between. I see other men and women that are well known and you can tell they have no problems thinking they are sexy. I need their recipe I guess. I agree it has to be different for men. Him avoiding the vanity and not over coming the low self esteem may indeed be that whole "product thing" maybe he feels the industry has made him that way to others,he didn't do it on his own so it's worth nothing. He has in the past (now this is depending on people's opinion here so go with me) dated women that are pretty but may not be considered by some to be gorgeous. Amber Heard is the typical blonde "cheerleader" type that most guys think they could never hook up with because they think the girl is out of their league. I do wonder what his thoughts are pertaining to his new dating relationship. If he feels such low self esteem then why would a girl like Amber Heard give him the time of day? Then again maybe this doesn't make much sense considering a lot of places talking about her with exception to two or three online don't feel she's all that. SO with that being said I was using it as an example of if a pretty girl wants to be with you - you gotta have something going on!
Unless I'm very very wrong in my opinion since people have said Johnny is a great judge of character and maybe he knows Amber doesn't want anything serious. Maybe he doesn't either so ...........if he were to know that I could see why it wouldn't give him a self esteem boost to be dating her.
I really feel that it depends on the day for everyone. Men and women have good and bad days about how they feel about themselves. Although it is interesting to see how "you sir are sexy and therefore I will stare at you" hasn't given his self esteem a boost in all these years. Wounded Child. He had a lot of traumatic and hurtful things happen as a kid. That's my opinion anyway.
Post by phigalilly on Jun 22, 2013 15:00:15 GMT -5
I imagine being super attractive, for someone who doesn't buy into the notion that beauty equals greater worth, can make a person feel as invisible as ugly people sometimes feel. There's all this attention coming at you, but it's all based on your appearance, something you can never really see or judge objectively, and not who you are as a human being. No one knows you, but everyone loves you. An unattractive person isn't going to get all that superficial attention, but that doesn't give any more substance to the attention pretty people have to deal with all the time. This is not something I've ever had to deal with, but I have a couple of friends who qualify as physically beautiful and they deal with attention daily that I would find really annoying. Strangers saying "I love you" or "Marry me," stuff like that. They're both showered with attention, and they both feel completely unseen because who they are is irrelevant. It's all about how they look.
He has to be aware of the affect his physical appearance has on people. Maybe he doesn't want to give in to the idea that his lucky genetic mix makes him better than people who weren't as fortunate. Maybe it's not that he doesn't see it, but that he's unwilling to make his appearance as important as the qualities he has that he'd rather be known for.
He is, however, just like everyone else when it comes to valuing beauty in a partner. I doubt Johnny Depp, even before he was famous, has ever had more than a drunken one-nighter with a woman no one would look at twice.